“Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do, but never gets you anywhere.” ~Erma Bombeck

Dear Universe,

Confession: I am a worrier.

I worry about things that are happening now, things that already happened, and things that may or may not happen.

It can be exhausting, frustrating and annoying—especially for the people around you who constantly have to remind you to not worry so much. I know so many of you reading this can relate to getting on the worry-train and riding it from one track to another track until you can’t remember why you got on in the first place!

The other day, I spoke with a friend who is pregnant and due in just a couple more months. She’s on bed rest right now and naturally feeling a bit anxious.

I shared with her something I haven’t really voiced with many. And that’s I often felt anxious when I was pregnant. It wasn’t until after my son’s arrival that I realized why.

I am the type of person who likes to plan. I make lists. I write dates and times and reminders and to-dos down in my planner. I make goals and work towards them. I envision what I want to manifest. And this system? It’s served me pretty well so far!

But being pregnant?

Well, you can’t plan how your pregnancy will be and you don’t know just when or how the baby will arrive. Heck, we didn’t even know the sex of our baby! Talk about not knowing how any of it would play out!

Of course the planner in me would be anxious. And of course the worrier in me would be, well… worried.

As soon as he was born though, the anxious feelings immediately dissipated. I remember having the thought—if I had been able to know when and how Bennett would arrive or exactly how it would play out, I would have been much more at ease!

But of course we can’t know that. There are certain things in our lives we cannot predict or fathom. Pregnancy and giving birth is certainly one of them!

All we can do is trust that we can handle whatever comes our way. Half the things we worry about never come to be anyway.

I feel grateful that I’m aware enough that when I would get anxious, I quickly calmed myself and redirected my thoughts. I never wanted my baby to pick up on my nervous energy. And so I defaulted to my spiritual tools—namely breathing, stretching, writing, and meditating.

I tried to reassure my friend that how she was feeling was completely normal—how come more women don’t share this? Why is talking about how we’re feeling while we’re pregnant so taboo? Each week felt like a new surprise, a new emotion  or a new physical feeling—that none of my friends or family had ever shared with me! So I tried to reassure her that yes, how she was feeling was normal and that before she knows it, her little baby boy will be in her arms.

I tried to remind her of who she is: strong, fierce, resilient, capable and so loving.

That baby sure is lucky to have her as his mama.

I felt compelled to share our conversation because I’m guessing other people may need to hear the message.

You can handle whatever comes your way.

Besides, worrying is like praying for what you don’t want so get off the worry-train and stay on track! Try to release the endless worry and focus on what you know to be true in the present. Maybe that means remembering a time when you worried for no reason or a time when you preserved and came out on top. Or maybe it’s just being present in the present, focusing on one breath at a time.

We can’t control what’s to come. All we can do is control how we react and move through the experience.

Whenever possible, choose to move through with grace, with kindness and with compassion—first for yourself, and then extend that love out to others.

Correction: I am a self-aware worrier. And because of this I make a conscious effort to worry less and trust more.

It feels a little more freeing that way.

With Gratitude,